College Admissions Essays
How to Answer Prompt #1 for the College Application Essay
for the University of California:
“Describe the World You Come From”
Only read this if you are applying to a UC (University of California school, such as UCLA, Berkeley, Santa Barbara, San Diego, Irvine, Santa Cruz, etc.).
There are two college essay prompts for their required
for incoming freshmen.
Here is some advice regarding the first one:
Prompt #1 (freshman applicants)
Describe the world you come from — for example, your family, community or school — and tell us how your world has shaped your dreams and aspirations.
Read this closely. Note that it asks you to describe one thing and then tell about another–so there are two points you need to address in your essay.
When you describe the world you come from, think of this in a figurative sense.
Do not just write about your hometown.
Instead of the word “world,” try substituting it for the word “community” or “background.”
As a “community,” almost anything can be your world (a mini-community of shared activities, people, passions or places), from your yoga class to your bedroom to your job washing dishes to your grandmother’s kitchen making tortilla soup to your two moms.
It’s wide open. Just pick a topic.
Also, the examples they give, “family, community or school” are just that, examples.
Do not write a little about each of these.
And do not just write about “my family” or “my school.” Way too broad.
Write about your uncle’s magic shop in an underprivileged neighborhood, or the Scrabble club you started at your school even though you are the world’s worst speller, or the old movie theater in your town where you first fell in love with cinema and the power of a visual story.
(Check out the link at bottom of this post to
with images and quotes to spark ideas for what makes your world.)
Quickie World-As-A-Community-Finder: What do you like/love to do? Where do you do it? Who do you do it with? Bingo! You have just landed on one of your worlds!
Another way to think about your world would be to show how your background has been challenging on some level–and how that has shaped and defined who you are.
In a way, your world is your life with its unique set of issues, obstacles or challenges.
Think of the saying: “Welcome to my world.”
If you have one piece of your life that shapes your “world” in a major way—something from your personal, cultural, educational, etc. background—and that colleges would understand you better if they knew what that was like, consider writing about it.
The world of living with two gay dads.
The world of living with an autistic sister.
The world of living with a bi-polar mom.
The world of living with immigrant grandparents.
The world of living on food stamps.
The world of living with perfectionists/slobs/religious nuts/alcoholics/seven siblings/foster home/military parents/home-schooling/white parents and you are asian/constant moving/famous mom, etc.
To write this type of “world” essay, pick a real-life example of a “time” in your life/world when that issue affected you, start your essay describing that specific incident or moment, then go into how dealing with that reality has affected you.
You might be surprised what comes out of you–and how it makes you feel.
I have had students who have written about almost all of these “life” issues.
Their essays have been intense and often soul-searching, but also memorable and meaningful.
Although I think the bulk of your college application essay should focus on this world, and how it has affected you, also address the second part about your dreams and aspirations.
This has the potential to be general and boring, so make sure to talk specifically about how you will apply the lessons (values, skills, ideas, insights, etc.) you have learned in your world to your future.
(Hint: It wouldn’t hurt if you can show how these dreams and aspirations link to your specific college goals. For example, if your “world” is hanging out in your parent’s garage fixing an old truck, mention how the problem-solving skills you learned there will help your aspirations to be some type of engineer one day.)
If you are one of those A-type overachievers (hey, it’s OK, these UCs are insanely competitive!) who still feels insecure about understanding the UC prompts, check out this 50-minute video of a counselor guru spelling it all out at a convention for college admissions folks.
Just don’t let her freak you out too much. Definitely good info here, but I say overkill.
It’s also from 2007, though prompts are the same. Your choice:
Here are some more helpful posts for answering UC Prompt #1:
Best thing to help you with your Describe the World You Come From essay is to read !
Make sure that you
by describing the setting.
MY MOST RECENT WORLD POST! Check out some of the comments from other students trying to figure out a “world” to write about in their UC essay in , where I share some of the questions students asked me to see if their world was interesting, or would make a great essay. Reading through these comments is a GREAT WAY TO FIND YOUR OWN WORLD TO WRITE ABOUT! (Yes, I was shouting at you!)
Need help for UC application essay Prompt #2:
can help you write your 650-word essay for the new Common Application.
Need help getting started? Here’s my sure-fire brainstorm guide: .
Still need a memorable topic for your college admissions essay? Here are some great posts to help you brainstorm:
Need help writing a “grabber” introduction for your college admission essay? Read this post, .
Best for last: You must check out
that uses images to help you find your “world” for your college application essay!***
Here is a post by another essay “expert,” Allen Grove, who shares his ideas in
The various UCs all seem to have slight variations on exactly what they look for in these personal statements. This
is from UCLA’s a
is from UC D
is from Berkeley.
See if this video from the UC Admissions Department helps.
I think it might give you an idea of what they want from the two personal statements, but not a lot on how to deliver it. That part is left up to you, as far as I can tell.
(Tips from video: “Be thoughtful, clear, succinct and provide depth.” “Just be honest.” “Focus on a strength.” “Write about what makes you different.” “I wrote from my heart.” All great stuff—the only thing missing is any direction, instruction or support for students on how to do all this in 500 words.)
*Also, if you are still looking for a “world” to write about, there are lots of ideas in the comments.
Definitely worth scrolling through to see what others are thinking of writing about. Thanks for sharing all your ideas!
I believe you can write these UC essays on your own. But if you feel like you would like my personal help with them or other college application essays, find details on my
Best of luck! Janine Robinson
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Hi, for the “world I come from” prompt, how specific can I get? I was thinking about writing about my hobby of drawing faces and how that connects to me. But I’m not sure if this is even answering the question.
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A Story About Fear
Some years ago, I went to an amusement park with my mother. At first, she was somewhat afraid of the roller coaster, but eventually relented in the name of adventure. As we boarded the roller coaster, I could see the tension in my mother’s body, undoubtedly caused by the adrenaline coursing through her veins with each hearbeat. I was probably feeling the same way, but since this is another one of those situations over which you have no control, it didn’t really bother me that much. Hey, if this was my day to die, then it is my day to die – might as well enjoy the ride before the accident!
As I finished my thought, the roller coaster started moving slowly. I could feel the weight of the metal that was going to hurl me at whirling speeds in a few minutes. My mother’s grip tightened with each passing second. I can only imagine what was going through her head right then. It probably contained some images of her flying through the air diving towards the ground.
Pretty soon, we were at the top. You could see my mother tensed and ready for a battle to the death. I, on the other hand, was as relaxed as I possibly could be, eagerly waiting to see what kind of strange sensations a couple extra gs would bring.
Before long, the roller coaster went over its apex and started accelerating downwards. At that time, I haven’t ridden a roller coaster in a while, so some terrifying sensations was definiately expected, Strangely, it wasn’t nearly as bad as I’d thought. The upwards “pull” feeling on my stomach wasn’t nearly as strong as I’d remembered. Maybe it has something to do with growing up and having a bigger body. Anyway, the random motions still seemed interesting, jerking me back and forth. I sat there, looking around at stuff at weird angles. I could probably have had a sandwich and read a book without it bothering me too much.
Out of the corner of my eyes, I caught a glimpse of my mother. She was completely bent over, with her head in between her arms, in one of the most terrified positions a person can be in. I couldn’t help but notice the irony of the situation. It reminds me of those cartoons where two guys fall off a roof, one guy lands on the floor, while another guy is grasping desperately onto the lowest ledge, only inches from the ground. The first guy taps the on the shoulder of the second guy, kind of saying, “Hey eerr, you know you can let go right?” This is exactly what I tried to do – I leaned over and gently tapped on mom on the back, seeing if she’ll relax. She barely acknowledged me, completely paralyzed by her own fear. Later, as we were getting off, she told me that she sprained her neck on the ride.
I am reminded of this experience every time I see people make a really big deal out of not so bad situations. For example, we hear of college students committing suicide because of the pressure of getting good grades. It’s so tempting to tap them on the shoulder and say, “You know – all that piece of paper says is you don’t know it very well right now – it’s not like you can’t just learn it later!” This is an example of something that could just be ignored, but instead is blown up into ridiculous proportions, just like Jack and Bob in .
I’ve actually known the college student mentioned above personally. We played chess together at one point in high school and I knew him to be one of the smartest people in the school. Yet, from what I’ve heard, he jumped off a bridge from the pressure of graduate school and because his best friend also did the same.
The Obstacles That Our Fears Create
In both of these situations, the person in question created a seemingly unsurmountable obstacle that exists solely in their imagination. In my mom’s case, she was so sure that she was going to die on the roller coaster that day, that she did everything she could to avoid the experience. As a result, not only did she not enjoy the ride, she had a sprained neck to go along with it. In the case of the student jumping off the bridge, he probably viewed certain accomplishments in graduate school as the ultimate achievement in life. Because he thought that if he didn’t achieve this, his life would have no meaning, he ended his life just to avoid “failing” at this imaginary task.
Looking around, there are numerous instances of fears that keep people from getting what they want every day. A guy standing next to a girl who likes him but he’s afraid of asking out. So he walks away, leaving himself and the girl disappointed. A guy who wants to start a business but sees all the problems before they even manifest. Ultimately, he decides against it because these problems seem so unsurmountable, leaving himself and his potential clients unhappy. Every day, many people are prevented from accomplishing their dreams due to these imaginary obstacles. I am sure that I have had my fair share of these unjustified fears. Here’s a few tips for combatting them:
Recognize Your Fears – First, you need to recognize that this is indeed one of the fears you have. If you already accept this particular fear as the absolute truth, then there is no way to face that particular fear and hence no way to overcome it. For example, say you want to start a business, but you are afraid of . Every time someone talks to you about starting a business, your immediate response is “Oh, that’s too risky for me”. In this instance, you have so internalized the fear of taking risks that you don’t even recognize it as one of your fears anymore. In your world, it becomes an absolute truth that starting a business = bad. You no longer recall why or how you came to that conclusion, just that it is.
This is an extremely dangerous mode to get into because not only are your fears limiting your progress, you don’t even know that it is! This is the very situation that the graduate student who committed suicide got himself into. He became so obsessed with doing well in school and feared failing so much, that failing = the end of life for him. Once he saw that he couldn’t accomplish what he wanted, he figured he was going to “die anyway”, so he might as well do it earlier.
You should always very carefully examine the reasons why you choose not to do something. As long as something doesn’t kill you or permanently injure you in some way, you can do it! Start by making a list of anything you want to do. If an automatic thought crosses your mind stating some reason you can’t do it now, that is the result of some sort of fear. For example, let’s say you want to start a business but you can’t do it now because you don’t have enough money, that is the result of the fear of going broke, the fear of being hungry, the fear of having no shelter, etc. Or maybe you are not talking to the guy or girl you like because now is not a good time. That is the result of the fear of being rejected, the fear of not belonging, the fear of being inadequate, etc. Write down the reasons you have and the fears associated with those reasons.
Once you have recognized your fears, you can now work towards defeating them. These are the things that are holding you back from exploring more possibilities and limiting your growth as a person.
Understanding The Root Of Your Fears – With your list of fears that are holding you back, you can now try to figure out where these fears come from. For each item on the list, examine whether this fear is the result of some other fears. Your goal is to consolidate your list to as few fears as possible, so that you can better understand where the root of your all your fears are coming from. For example, say one of the items on your list is the fear of being poor. Ask yourself, why am I afraid of being poor? Maybe it’s because being poor limits your freedom. Maybe it makes you insecure about your ability to support yourself. From that one fear, you have actually expanded your list to two fears. Continue this process and ask yourself why you are afraid of having no freedom and why you are afraid of being unable to support yourself.
When you start this exercise, your list will probably grow bigger and bigger as your discover more and more of your fears. However, like finding bugs in software engineering (and then fixing them), you eventually will hit a peak and the number on that list will start to decrease. Try to find as many common base fears as possible, so that you have a smaller number of fears to have to work on. I also find this excerise to really help with knowing yourself better.
When I finished this process, I only had one fear left on the list – the fear of not existing.
Overcoming Your Fears – Fear, as far as I can tell, is the result of uncertainty about a situation. We fear death because we don’t know what happens after it. We fear losing our jobs because we don’t know if there is another way we’ll be able to support ourselves. We fear asking a person out on a date because we don’t know what the other person’s expectations are and whether they would say yes or no. In all of these instances, fear comes from not knowing what we would do should some particular situation happen.
To get rid of the fear, simply figure out what you will do in each of the possible scenarios. For example, for the fear of asking someone out on a date, figure out what you would do if he/she says yes, he/she says no, he/she says yes with a smile, he/she says no with a smile, he/she throws a glass of water at you, etc. Once you know exactly how to handle every single situation, there is simply nothing to be afraid of anymore.
Of course, it’s not always easy to plan out exactly what to do in every situation. How do you even go about doing that? There are infinite number of situations that can come up, so there is no way to “memorize the correct action” for each particular situation. This is where
helps tremendously. When you have a definite purpose that encompasses all situations, then you will always have something fall back on if you don’t know exactly what to do.
For me, that purpose is existence. In any situation where I am unsure or confused, I will pick the option that maximizes my existence. Dying? No problem, I will just create as much stuff as possible (could be things or ideas) while I am alive and my existence will become these things. Asking for a date? if yes, we find out more about each other. If no, I go back to my happy single life and possibly try again at a later time. Losing my job? I will try to find some other way to increase my existence. Sure, I may still be afraid from time to time since I haven’t worked every single thing out, but given a bit of time, I will always know which path to take.
Having this purpose is like having a giant compass whenever you are lost. You may not know where you are now, but you will always end up at your destination if you follow the general. Knowing this, what is there to be afraid of? You will get what you want, you are heading the right way, and you do know what to do when you are lost. Since this is an internal thing, this sure seems like a good saying: “For all problems, look inside yourself”.
Figure out your purpose and fear will never control you!
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