If You Are Getting Married To A Nigerian Man As A Foreign Lady Read ThisUpdated on November 4, 2014
How Do I Find True Love In Nigeria?
How do I find true love, how do I find the right life partner, how do I know that my boyfriend wants me for marriage, how do I know that my boyfriend truly loves me, how do I avoid being used and dumped by a man? All these questions and more are often the usual questions that occupy the minds of majority of single ladies globally, and it is no doubt that these questions are critical questions that also calls for a critical answer. In this very write-up, I am not going to answer those questions, but I will indirectly give clues on how to manage such situations, meanwhile, if you truly want to learn more or find answers to the above questions, then you must find time to go through some of my relationship articles, by navigating through my profile. But for now, I am going to focus on assisting foreign ladies wishing or desiring to get married to a Nigerian man, or best, to assist foreign ladies already in a committed relationship with a Nigerian man, and are probably contemplating on settling down with him.
Before I forge ahead, I would like to make a promise to all my readers (as usual) that whatever information I shall be revealing here, shall be based on zero partiality, prejudice or favoritism. Again, I want to stress again that I am going to be as honest as possible in disclosing some useful information that would assist all foreign ladies desiring to marry a Nigerian man. And if you are a Nigerian guy reading this article, please, do not feel bad, I am only trying to assist people (particularly innocent foreign ladies) to enjoy a happy loving relationship built on true love. Haven made things clear, let’s move on.Who Is A Nigerian Man?Nigeria to start with, is a country located in the western region of Africa, with over 140,000,000 populations as at the last census. Nigeria is majorly a black African nation, blessed with numerous mineral resources, especially the black crude oil, found bountifully in the south-south, and south-east regions of Nigeria. Nigeria comprises of so many tribes, but the major tribes or dominant tribes in Nigeria are: Ibo, Hausa, and Yoruba.
Nigeria was colonized by Britain, and as a result, its official language is English, with other local dialects, viz. Igbo, Hausa and Yoruba, as the major dominant local dialects.
If you want to define a Nigerian man, you must first identify his tribal origin, whether he is Ibo, Yoruba or Hausa. I intentionally ignored other tribes to make this write-up snappy, and for the fact that other minor tribes have their cultures and traditions revolving around the major three tribes I have mentioned above. Haven identified his tribe, you need to also find out his religious background, but if he is Ibo, there’s no need for further investigation because 99.9% of Ibos are Christian by religion. But if he is a Yoruba, then you need to find out his religion because in Yoruba tribe, there are majorly three dominant religions- Christianity, Islam, and Ifa. For the Hausas, 98% practice Islam.
We also have the Bini, Ijaw, Ogoni, Fulani, etc. But they are in minority.
To give you a basic understanding of the Nigerian man, I will classify them in three, based on the three major tribes- Ibo, Yoruba, and Hausa.
The Ibo Man
The Ibo man originated from the Ibo tribe, found in the south-eastern region of Nigeria. By history, Ibos are known for trade and little agricultural activities like farming with hoe, etc. An Ibo man loves business, trade and anything that will make him to be in constant contact with money. The Ibos paid less attention to western education during colonialism, but after the civil war which ended in 1969, the Ibos diversified their interest to include western education, business, and for this reasons and more, they began to migrate within and across the Nigerian borders, which is the single reason why in every 10 Nigerians you see in a foreign nation, 4 is Ibo. Their desperate desire for success, financial prosperity, and wealth can be traced back to their ancestral history. History has also traced Ibo tribe to have an ancestral linkage with the Jews, and this can be seen in their ingenuity in so many human activities, especially in trade, craft, local technology, etc.
Ibos are no doubt the heart and prime movers of the Nigerian economy. They are innovative, creative, ambitious, peaceful, etc, but they love financial prosperity more than any other thing in life. You can play with an Ibo man’s life, but don’t play with his money! So when dealing with an Ibo man, make sure you don’t
therefore, if you guard his wallet for him, you will always be his best friend. And this love for financial breakthrough is one of the things that make them very creative and ambitious in whatever they do in life. Note this, any shop, business, etc owned by a Nigerian in your country, go and find out, it is owned or founded by an Ibo man. The above assertion is not just applicable in foreign nations alone, but also in Nigeria.
What am I trying to say in essence? An Ibo man always carry in mind his monetary gain or benefit in whatever thing he does in life- be it business, education, relationship, etc. It is this trait that earned Ibos criticisms from other Nigerian tribes, because in whatever they are doing, they are always conscious of what they would gain financially. To wrap it up, Ibo man is just similar to a Chinese man in terms of- money consciousness, creativity, and craftsmanship.
The Ibo man of today dislikes polygamy, and he has his immediate family (parents and siblings) at heart, and if you want to win his heart, don’t play with his immediate family. In fact, if you want to win his heart fast, and maybe get him running after you for marriage, you must show a committed interest in his immediate family.
The Yoruba Man
The Yoruba man comes from the Yoruba tribe, found in the south-western part of Nigeria. They are also found in Haiti, Togo, etc. The Yoruba man loves partying, celebrations and ceremonies, and he wouldn’t mind borrowing to celebrate a ceremony- be it burial, child-naming, birthday, marriage, memorial, etc.
The Yorubas are the most educated tribe in Nigeria, and it has been a popular saying in Nigeria that in every Yoruba family, there is a professor. The Yorubas of the ancient times are known with agriculture (cocoa farming, rubber, etc). They are the pioneers of Nigeria’s legal sector, and they are very good in that aspect. The Yoruba man is more immune to polygamy than the Ibo man. The Yoruba man loves peace a lot, and he is ready to part away with his money to make peace.
If you want a Yoruba man to have you at heart, always take him to parties, and if possible, organize parties for him often, and you’re his best friend.
The Hausa Man
The Hausas are found in the northern part of Nigeria, and they have certain things in common with the North African nations, maybe as a result of their religion. Their most valued treasure is their I don’t joke with it if you want to live in peace with them.
They are known with agricultural activities in large scale- farming, cattle rearing, etc. Honestly, they are the food hub of Nigeria. They are polygamous in nature, and it is also traditional for a Hausa man to marry more than one wife, if he so desires.
The Hausa man is peace-loving without his religion (Islam), he is generous, in fact, he is the most generous man amongst all Nigerian tribes, he’s not so conscious of money, and he’s ready to die for his religious belief. If you are not an Islam, it might be impossible for a Hausa man to marry you.Before Falling In Love With A Nigerian Man
Haven learned one or two things about the Nigerian man, let’s now look at some vital facts you mustn’t ignore when deciding to date or marry a Nigerian man abroad.
If you truly want to marry or date a Nigerian man living abroad, and enjoy a lasting, genuine relationship, follow the rules below:
Don’t marry a Nigerian man living illegally in your country or any foreign nation. A Nigerian man that finally made the harsh decision to leave his homeland to migrate to a foreign nation without legal travel and resident permits will do anything beyond his comfort to remain in that foreign nation because he knows that home is not the best for him. Therefore, he wouldn’t mind marrying a foreign lady he may not truly love or like just to secure a resident permit. Therefore, if you truly want a lasting, genuine relationship or marriage with a Nigerian man abroad, make sure he is a legal resident with good means of livelihood.
Don’t marry a Nigerian man you met abroad until you have known his true identity as regards to- marital status, family background, etc.
I made this point because some Nigerian men you see in your country are already married to a Nigerian lady here in Nigeria before they set out to travel abroad to look for a greener pasture.
Don’t rush to marry a Nigerian man without a reasonable educational background.
Know his educational background because it matters a lot in determining his way of reasoning.
He might have been frustrated in life and seeking for a way out, and just faking love to get something from you, and once he gets that, he is off and creates bad name or image that all Nigerian men are evil, whereas it is not true..
There are awesome Nigerian men that can turn your life around for good, find them and stop going after bad guys spoiling the good image of Nigerian people.
If you truly have interest in Nigerian men, and you want to marry or date a Nigerian man, search for those living comfortably in Nigeria or Abroad with the above qualities (good education, good family background, legal residence, etc, etc).
If truly you want a sincere Nigerian man to marry or date, get one who is not living in Europe/America, etc illegally, and make sure he is doing a good steady job and well educated up to tertiary level. You know why? Because such Nigerians go into relationship with foreigners out of love and not for anything else like: securing permanent residence, monetary gains, etc.
Unfortunately, most of the aforementioned class of Nigerians would rather prefer to come back home and look for a wife, you know why? Because our cultural and traditional values are different, stronger and as such, supports marriage better. For instance, when a typical Nigerian couple is going through marital crises, they would hardly ever throw in the towel like it is generally done in the western countries. Remember, marriage in Nigeria is a union of two families- the man’s and the woman’s family, and as such the families would step in if things are getting out of hand and they would do whatever they can to settle the matter amicably within the family level. Nigerians in general, have unquestionable respect for their parents and would listen and obey them at any point in time. The western culture is very marriage is just between the couples, families are not expected to come in, whether in good or in bad. Feminism and gender equality have both weakened marriage union in the western countries. In ever ship, there must be a captain...and naturally, men were ordained to be the captain of the marriage ship, but government policies, gender equality and feminism have jointly harmed marriage values in western countries, leading to high divorce rate.
Divorce is part of the western culture now due to certain practices like- feminism and gender equality, which is a fall out of the replace and don't repair concept. In western countries today, laws have made it very lucrative for women to divorce their husbands as such they don't even work hard at sustaining their marriages, since they would benefit more when the marriage is torn apart in a law court. In fact most western women instead of looking for ways of resolving marital crises, prefer to threaten their man with divorce, and this is a situation a true Nigerian man snares at. Our culture also has roles and responsibilities for men and women in marriage. The woman looks after the day to day running of the home while the man provides for the home. It is deeply entrenched in our tradition and this has helped to maintain the respect and harmony in the house. The 50/50 concept of the western culture means there are two captains in one ship, resulting to unnecessary tension, arguments and confusion on roles and responsibilities. I know that some readers may not agree to this because to them it is the best practice, but let me now challenge you, how come the business world is yet to adopt this 50/50 concept if it is truly a good practice?
The bottom line of it all is that a typical Nigerian man with no hindrances would prefer to come back home to marry a Nigerian girl, so if you are non-Nigerian and in a relationship with a true Nigerian man then shine your eyes well! Or just take it as it is without expecting too much, that’s my word for now, good luck!My Eye-Opening Book for Foreign Ladies Dating Nigerian MenDear fans and readers,
I want to officially announce to you guys the launch of my eye-opening book titled: "Before You Marry Your Nigerian Man", which I want to advice and encourage all foreign ladies dating, in a relationship or married to a Nigerian man to get a copy.
I wrote the book after years of helping foreign ladies fix their relationships and after helping to guide foreign ladies to make the best choice when befriending Nigerian men...you will come back to say: THANK YOU. I just published the book...and Amazon just approved it and added it to their Amazon Kindle store after a rigorous review of the book.
Kindly find the book here:
I answered most of the questions you definitely need to know...
Before you go into any other relationship or marriage with a Nigerian man, please try and get a copy of this book and read it from beginning to end...and after you purchase it, please make a short review...be honest in your review...recommend it to your close friends because it will save them from future heartbreak and will also guide them on how to make the best choice of a Nigerian man.
Thanks...hope to hear from you all soon.
Frank AnokDISCLAIMERThis article was not written to destroy the good image of Nigerians! It wasn't written to paint foreign men evil either, but it was written out of love and passion to create a positive change in the institution of interracial dating and marriage, so that we all can enjoy a happy world.
Don't let this article stop you from reaching out for love, but let it guide you towards making a sound judgment that would lead you to a happy relationship and marriage.
Feminism and gender equality are good practices, but dear single and married ladies, please don't let that man-made laws and policies destroy your life's happiness because not all man-made laws bring happiness when you follow them.
The true plan of God, and the natural architecture of marriage is that the husband should be the leader while the wife follows and helps him when he falls short, but never otherwise.
If you are a woman and you are earning more than your husband, please don't let this make you to become unruly and not submissive because every man wants a submissive woman.
To win the hearts of men- white, black, arab or asian, be humble, respectful and submissive and all men will worship the ground you walk on...but if you are pompous, proud and disrespectful to men just because you earn higher income than them, or just because you come from a rich family background, I tell you that you will live a miserable life, and most men of integrity will run far away from you, leaving you in the mercy of playboys ready to dribble your pompous heart away like Lionel Messi! Peace
You can help the HubPages community highlight top quality content by ranking this article up or down.&{107} & &{22} & &{31} & &{29} & &{50}Recommended Hubs
MORE BY THIS AUTHOR
Please rate this article using the scale below. The scale is from 1 to 10, where 10 is the best and 1 is the worst.
Copyright & 2015 HubPages Inc. and respective owners.Other product and company names shown may be trademarks of their respective owners.HubPages& is a registered Service Mark of HubPages, Inc.HubPages and Hubbers (authors) may earn revenue on this page based on affiliate relationships and advertisements with partners including Amazon, eBay, Google, and others.
(0.52 sec)Troperville
Playthings
Troperville
Playthings
Show Spoilers:
Night Vision:
for more options ]
Other Categories
Topical Tropes
Sex Equals Love
You need to
to do this.
if you don't have an account
"It's like a disease. I slept with Robin one time and I caught feelings. I caught feelings bad!"
—Barney Stinson,
Back before the sexual revolution, men and women could have sex if they were married or... well, that was pretty much the only way.
Okay, okay. Truthfully, premarital and extramarital sex have been occurring pretty much since marriage was invented. But it was looked upon with scorn, and often treated as though it didn't exist.
Even more truthfully, until the 19th/20th century, marriage was for considerations of status, wealth or power, and progeny (for anyone you're likely to read about, anyway. This may be one of those cases in history where it may be better to be poor- ordinary people were more usually in love at least at the sta they may also have been less likely to be virgins, though records of their lives are so sketchy it's quite hard to gauge what were the norms). For love or sex-for-the-fun-of-it one could have a mistress, only the Church vociferously frowned upon extra-marital sex. Love within the marriage was considered a lucky bonus, if it grew there (and it probably didn't)
Still, sex was seen as a sacred and special thing, so people still refused to have a physical relationship unless love (or at least the need to produce an heir) was involved, and doing it within a marriage was still the rule. Then, the unthinkable (or maybe just long-dreaded) happened: Some
acted as if it were OK to have sex ! No Strings Attached!
This cultural shift in the morality of sexuality was a reaction to the technological invention of the birth control pill, which gave women substantially more control over pregnancy than
offered. Secure from the possibility of being saddled with a kid born out of wedlock for the rest of their lives (which culturally back then was considered way worse than it is today) from the events of one brief coupling, women could afford to be freer with sex. Which meant
were fearful of what
would say about that, and thus a trope was born, described herein:
If a man and a woman have a sexual relationship that is not based on love, one of them will fall in love with the other.
First addendum: If the man is a conservative, it will be he. If he is a liberal, it will be either the woman or his partner.
Second addendum: The partner who is in love will demand fidelity from the other partner.
Curiously, on
some people view premarital or even casual sex itself as a blameless and pure act, with no negative consequences or moral stigma attached. This is considered either a symptom of the liberation of the human race from unnecessary complications and hang-ups, a depressing consequence of the modern tendency to view everything physical as without consequence and everything non-physical as without value, .
Oddly enough, even open-minded fandoms fall prey to this. An earmark of the more obsessive
is no such thing as casual relationships/ dating/sex.
If a man and a woman have sex, theirs will be considered by shippers the .
Most couples who start a relationship based only on sex .
Still more often, there is a tendency among fandom to look upon any sex in a given series or film as cheap , preferring to keep their relationships relegated to
and seemingly disregarding the fact that people in love have been known, from time to time, to have sex. This is particularly prevalent among .
In reality the correlation between sex and romance can be anything from strict fidelity between exclusive lovers, to casual sex between friends, to dating, experimenting and anything in-betweennote&. Emotions sometimes get the jump on us, and even though people tend to date each other with prospect towards a potential helpmeet, sometimes dating can become casual sex, and sometimes the reverse can be true. So yes, in
people in a casual sexual relationship can find that after a while physical intimacy with another person fosters a romantic inclination, however, this trope is when having a sexual relationship with another person will result in a romantic relationship, no arguing.
See also: , , , , , , , , and . The inverse of this trope is .
&&&&open/close all folders&
&&&&Anime & Manga&
To a degree this could apply to Guts and Casca from . After helping each other, they begin treat each other more nicely and have a few nice conversations where they're not biting each other's head off. Guts and Casca are separated for a year and when he returns, not 24 hours later they have sex. Guts treats Casca as his true love from that point on.
in that he has serious issues with intimacy such that it's believable that he would bond very strongly to someone who was able to g also,
it's not as though they had much time to work out what an actual relationship between the two of them would be like.
In , this was Hiroki's thought when he slept with his best friend, hoping that it would . It backfired badly on him.
In , Kiri and Mikhail don't like each other at first but begin a sexual relationship very quickly because they have a supernatural bond that pulls them together. Eventually they do fall in love.
is about a one-night stand that ends up becoming a
which end up becoming an actual relationship.
It's mentioned somewhere in the
novels that Yaya would seduce girls and that 'emotions of love would grow afterwords.'
in the manga version of , with
Princess Rackesis and Finn. They had gone through
that left them emotionally drained and barely able to return from the , and also
they were going to be separated, as Fin was about to return to Lester with Quan and Ethlyn so . Even more so, it's kind of a plot point later:
the night where Raquesis and Fin "deflowered" each other... was the one where Raquesis's eldest son Delmud was conceived.
Flay Allster from
(in)famously fooled Kira into this trope, by seducing him when he was weak
as a method of
since she blames him for the death of her beloved father.
Ironically, she
in the end.
were already strongly attached to each other and Yuki darted back and forth about how he felt about Yuno because of being subjected to the sight of the corpses in her house. He later falls head over heels for her midway in the beginning when he decided to put to rest his suspicions about her being touched by how much she protects him. However, Yuno kidnapping him in the middle of the series has him going back to being healthily cautious of her then went back to loving her when he told him he could bring his parents back to life by becoming god. Come the finale he decided to have sex with her on the 27th of July rather than the 28th as predicted by the Future Diary in the beginning of the story on Yuno's phone. After consummating their love in chapter 52 (manga)/episode 23(Anime) everything comes to a head when
Yuki asks her if she lied to him about being able to revive his parents which she admits to lying about and apologizes. While that matter is easily brushed aside
Yuno's real trigger to starting
of the story is confronting him about Akise's . No matter what happened in the
Yuki cannot bring himself to kill Yuno even though she makes it clear she's out to kill him so she can carry out her
to continue repeat the Future Diary battle with Yukiteru's from other worlds.
&&&&Comic Books&
Jack Hawksmoor, from superhero team , had such a contract with colleague Angie, but has
the desire for a romantic relationship — and so, for that matter, has she.
Lieutenant
has an one-night stand with biologist Kim Keller when visiting one of the Worlds of Aldebaran (). He would later forbid her from having a similar relationship with a colonist, claiming it would compromise her partiality regarding the object of study (a ).
&&&&Fan Works&
While the relationship between the prostitute and her recurring client is primarily sexual and professional, their genuine warmth and affection for each other are built on real connection and understanding. This is make particularly visible in a very heartwarming way near the end, where the protagonist talks about making the prostitute his bride and taking her home with him when the war is over. Also, she won't kiss clients while on the job, but kisses him when their session is over.
that he doesn't understand the difference.
Blaine tried to invoke this out of loneliness and naivete.
He's now carrying lots of emotional baggage.
when Syaoran starts to fall for Kurogane during their
relationship, Kurogane breaks it off because he doesn't feel that way. Kurogane, to his horror, ends up developing feelings for Syaoran regardless. Justified because they had already formed intense emotional bonds before and after they started to sleep together.
&&&&Films&
Juno McGuff and Paulie Bleeker in .
Edward and Vivian in the film .
Played absolutely straight in . Direct quote:
"Don't pretend that last night didn't mean anything to you.... We tried to fuck and instead, we wound up making love."
Jim and Michelle from the
: Theodore and Samantha seem like good friends (she even encourages him to go out with another woman and get laid) until one night of intense cybersex kicks their relationship into gear.
: Zoe, who works part-time as a prostitute, falls in love with her client Zed because he makes her climax, which she believes only someone who's a good person could do. Later circumstances make this attraction more believable when Zed saves Zoe's life from his homicidal friend.
&&&&Literature&
In something of an inversion (?), the titular
finds herself alternately saving a hunky barbarian's life and being saved by him. The protagonist develops budding feelings of friendship and love for him, but having grown up a Drow, she has no idea what they are or how to deal with them, so she falls back on a much simpler emotion that she knows and understands very well.
deconstructs and subverts this in its main message where it stresses that sex and love are two separate things, and a relationship based entirely on sex and physical attraction is not going to last long.
Zigzagged in :
The first woman Harry has an active relationship with, Susan, he is unquestionably in love with, and vice-versa. We're talking literally unquestionable here: true, selfless love, coupled with intimacy,
Later on, after some very complicated issues pop up that ruin Harry and Susan's lives, Harry begins a relationship with Anastasia Luccio, . Then
it is revealed that Luccio was being mind-controlled and her attraction to Harry was intended to let the traitor keep tabs on him, and as a result Harry's immunity to the White Court is gone, further proving that there wasn't any "true" love involved.
The relationship between Thomas and Justine develops into this. At first Justine was just a girl that Thomas cared for, and being a White Court vampire, he
from her regularly. As time passed, though, he cared more and more for her, until
Justine saves his life from fatal injuries by letting him feed on her, which would kill her. He realized he would do this and barely manages to avoid eating too much of her life force, and in the process his affection for her became true love. And as a direct result of this,
Thomas can no longer touch Justine, as his body automatically tries to feed from hers when in contact, resulting in severe burns on his skin at best. Ultimately, Justine manages to figure out a way around this issue:
Have sex with someone else who doesn't love her, which removes the protection from White Court feedings, and then she and Thomas can be together. Rinse and repeat.
&&&&Live-Action TV&
Done perplexingly in the
episode . The main character and his lover interest spend one night together and everyone in the movie treats them as if they're in a long term relationship.
In , Rory had a friends-with-benefits/casual dating arrangement with Logan who was a known womanizer. When she decided she couldn't handle it and tried to break it off, he, of course, offered a commitment.
: Jerry started a sexual-only relationship with his friend Elaine Benes, based on a ill-defined set of laws. At the end of the episode, the relationship had evolved to a romantic one, described by them as "this, that and the other". The writers admit they wouldn't have done this if they'd known the show would last so long, so after the following season
J.D started a similar relationship as "sex buddies" with ex-girlfriend Elliot Reid, from , a season after they broke up. When he realised he was still in love with her and decided to tell her, she broke up with him before he could, ironically because she knew that they would fall in love again and didn't want that to happen (, that one).
: Chandler and Monica started a sexual relationship in London that they initially intended to limit to London. That fell apart after only one episode. The casual nature of their relationship fell apart after only three, and they eventually ended up . Subverted in that several episodes throughout the first four seasons (when they were just friends and nothing more) had made it clear that they did love each other very much, just not in a sexual way. Apparently, introducing the sex was the only nudge needed for them to cross what was clearly (for them) a blurred line between platonic and romantic love.
In , Owen began having uncompromised sex with his colleague Gwen Cooper. This sexual relationship subverted the
idea when it broke down due to Owen falling in love with someone else.
Played straight with Jack and Ianto. Their relationship does turn into mutual love, but Ianto's more openly attached.
Lawyer Brad Chase, from , had an agreement centering around sex with his colleague Denise, described as "Friend With Benefits". They are now engaged, at his request.
Doctors Chase and Cameron, fellows of doctor Gregory , started having casual sex at Cameron's suggestion. Cameron later broke the relationship off when Chase developed feelings for her, but they did end up together at the end of the season (3) and married at the end of season 5.
And divorced halfway through season 6.
In an episode of , Chiana tries to convince Crichton to try this strategy on Aeryn: "You gotta go fast with the body, slow with the soul." He doesn't go for it.
Rather sadly, D'Argo believes in this trope and Chiana...doesn't.
Of course, D'Argo is a member of a , and with those races, either sex is a marriage proposal, or it never means anything ever, with no gray area in between.
Subverted into Love Equals Sex between Elizabeth and Lawrence of period drama . They're married, but he's an aloof poet and refuses to touch her. It doesn't help matters that when she attempts to get an annulment on grounds of impotence, she's .
Subverted in
when Carrie tries to go on actual dates with her "fuck buddy," convinced that their great sex has to mean a great emotional connection as well. It doesn't.
Barney fell in love with Robin after having slept with her in a season three episode of . He didn't actually realize that he was in love with her until he had a near-death experience, though.
Also played with in a later episode: After Ted and Robin decide to be , Lily
Ted and Robin are both fine—they never actually fall back in love, although they both worry about the fact that they somehow automatically start doing little lovey-dovey things like a kiss goodbye every morning. In the end, the person it winds up hurting is Barney, who's secretly in love with Robin. When Ted figures this out, he immediately breaks it off with Robin and allows her to think it's because he's worried about this trope (since Ted is notorious for being a romantic sap), to preserve Barney's secret.
After deflowering
in the back of his limo, Chuck found himself unable to sleep and with a sickening fluttering feeling in his stomach. Blair correctly diagnosed them as butterflies and demanded they be murdered. Instead he began pursuing her and eventually she fell in love with him too.
. Anya claims to want to have sex with Xander only as a way to get over him. Sure enough once they do have sex, she wants to make the next step so they start dating in the very next episode and end up having a long-term relationship.
Averted with everyone Faith has sex with. At one point in Season 3, she takes Xander's virginity. Nothing else comes of it (in fact Xander nearly gets killed by Faith after assuming this trope ). In Season 7, she and a guy do hook up. They break up in-between seasons and he's . Also averted with Buffy's fling with Parker, though that was him being a dick and her taking it really badly.
Averted in Season 6. Spike hopes that his sexual relationship with Buffy will eventually lead to his love for her being returned. Buffy repeatedly insists () that there's nothing between them except sex, and for Spike to even call her "luv" or "my girl" is a guaranteed . After Buffy dumps him, Spike tries to rape her in the belief that she did feel love during their rough sex and Buffy is simply in denial.
. Wesley and Lilah have very disturbing sex-only encounters for a while, eventually placing a bet on who would be first to call it a "relationship." Wesley loses. It's shown that sex ends up causing emotional attachments and complications for both of them, with each of them trying to "save" the other: Wesley had hoped to save her from evil and Lilah had hoped to corrupt him to evil. This does not end well.
Averted with the pretty much pointless sex scene between Eve and Angel in Season 5. It's also implied that Spike and Angelus did it once, and it was pretty traumatic for Spike.
movie, Degrassi Takes Manhattan, Spinner and Emma decide they are meant to be together after a couple days of friendship, an , and one night of sex. The really crazy thing? Both of them were too drunk to actually remember said sex.
Well to be fair, they did actually spend a few more days having sex before deciding to stay married for good.
In the first episode of
a character is commenting on the fact that almost all lesbians in a given community have done each other eventually. This leads her to conclude that we are all connected by "love."
&&&&Music&
Psychostick song Orgasm Equals Love parodies this trope.
&&&&Professional Wrestling&
was madly in love with The Lovely Lacey, but she only viewed him as a tool. Lacey loved , and was having sex with him too, which Colt wasn't afraid to rub in Jimmy's face. Then Colt dumped Lacey, after he got tired of sex because he didn't love her. Jacobs kicks Colt's ass, many events transpire, Lacey "rewards" Jacobs for all his work and suddenly she is madly in love with him. Jimmy, perhaps recognizing this trope, wants to slow down to ensure their relationship isn't based on lust. Its not, but sex is what changed Lacey's tune, and it's also what broke them apart when Lacey, recruiting for Jimmy's Age Of The Fall, ends up falling for and sleeping with , who kisses and tells.
&&&&Video Games&
Largely averted in . The Player Character can engage in, ahem, relations with a number of NPCs without love entering into it. Somewhat played straight in that two of the game's main love interests ? Zevran and Morrigan ? will have casual sex with you, but will eventually fall in love with you if you continue the relationship. (You CAN end the relationship after one encounter, however.) The other two love interests, Alistair and Leliana, will only invite you to bed once they've developed feelings for your character.
It can be said that three of the four love interests will demand fidelity from the PC. (Zevran is cool with you jumping into bed with whoever you like, so long as the other characters aren't getting too attached.)
Morrigan doesn't want you sleeping with others long before she even understands the concept of love. Why? Because Morrigan doesn't like to share her things.
Played straight in
with Isabela. Her relationship with Hawke started out as an amusing diversion, yet three years later she's ready to admit that she's falling for Hawke.
Played with a little bit with Isabela actually, since the sexual element of the relationship starts something like three or four years before she will come forward about bringing feelings into the mix. And even then that
Otherwise, it really will
Averted with the other three romanceable companions, however.
Played with in several ways in . About half of the romance paths end in a sex scene, but three of them are aliens, and their
means they have to be really careful, and a lot of time is spent psyching themselves up. Tali is initially really nervous but later says that it was , while Garrus and female Shepard start out with the plan of having a
relationship, but as things progress, it's obvious that Garrus really does have romantic feelings for Shepard — before they have sex. So they're more of an aversion than anything else. Completely averted with : fairly early on, you can have casual sex with her, but once you do, she won't talk to you again. Turning down the sex leads her to slowly come out of her shell, and the ending of her romance implies kissing, but no sex.
In , the official comic "A Cold Day In Hell" introduced Heavy Weapons Guy's three younger sisters, who spent their entire lives thus far locked in Heavy's cabin, in an attempt to keep them safe from the Communists trying to kill them. As a result, the now-grown sisters have gotten a little desperate for sex, and Zhanna, the oldest, propositions Soldier for sex almost immediately upon seeing him. The two hit it off almost immediately, and as of the next comic, "Blood In The Water", Zhanna and Soldier are an engaged , with Soldier even slicing the ears off his enemies in an attempt to make his fianceé a necklace.
&&&&Visual Novels&
Averted in
twice in Hagino's route. First, they start to have sex at the end of a date before really loving the other, then stopping. Later, there's an optional sex encounter with the woman Hiroki used to hate and still doesn't really like.
This is one of the issues behind
Because of Yasu's mutilated sexual organs
is unable to have sex and is afraid that the persons his/her alternative selves/personas (Shannon, Kanon, Beatrice) love will leave him/her if (s)he reveales the truth. The series never comments upon whether
Yasu is right or not but that's not the point, the important part is that those feelings exist and is a big part of
Yasu's problems.
Inverted and (possibly) played straight in Emi's path in . Emi is
afraid to get emotionally close to her boyfriend Hisao, even after they've started having sex, because she's afraid of being hurt like . Hisao is rather frustrated and refers to their relationship as , and to actually approach Emi in the emotional sense, he will have to work hard.
In , the sign that a girl is in love with the
is that she'll be willing to have sex with him.
&&&&Web Comics&
subverts this one step forward: two characters in the midst of some weirdly flavored
finally have sex (and presumably continue to do so)... but they're still not sure if they're even in a relationship yet.
arc had Thea discovering Angel was sleeping with another woman. When Thea calls Angel out on this, Angel states that Thea was never her girlfriend. Thea is hurt by this because she assumed that the pair of them having sex in the back room of the bar all the time meant they were a couple, honestly baffled when Hazel asked.
Hazel: Did she know she was your girlfriend?
Thea: You act like she doesn't know what a girlfriend is.
The trope is lampshaded in
strip, when Tina explains that sex in a relationship does not necessarily mean emotional closeness.